I'm through with this. It was a nice ideal to have for a while but in the end it doesn't really work, like most things it seems these days. I just don't see the point, holding on to something that's really just a huge joke. Everlasting hope. Second chances. Holy fire. Rebirth. Beauty. Truth. None of these were ever real no matter how much I tried to believe otherwise. It's not reality. It could never be that good...

Or maybe it is real. Maybe it does exist. Maybe I'm just not worthy of the title. I've been told as such. It's a nightmare trying to hold yourself to a standard of being that only the best and brightest are reserved for. "The bright ones" as some might call them. Those that deserve the recognition they receive, that deserve the peace that comes with it. Those that do everything right and no one dismisses. Let those who are worthy of it have it. Leave me my shadow.

What could be worse than wanting to sign a beautiful song that no one wants to hear. Being happy with yourself is the utmost, but what does it matter if you're the only one who is. Is it self-indulgent to want a piece of the sun for yourself, or is it just natural? And what do you do when everyone around you has theirs and is unwilling to share? They go off and live their adventures and grasp their dreams while you sit at home, starring at blank walls and playing single notes of a melody that no one would want to listen to. I wanted to sing a song of glory and hope. Instead I wrote a dirge.

Dreams are born and die everyday. You can live your entire life chasing something that's not there. And still people tell you to hold on, but where are they when they run out of cute little sayings hidden in fortune cookies? With those that are less complicated, that are easier, that are worth it. And all that's left are the shattered pieces of something that could have been great if it had had the chance. The life is a song, but the dream always dies in silence. Lost and forgotten.

So why live a lie? Admit defeat. Move on. There's nothing left now. No second chances for this bird. Every flower gets a chance, but some flowers just bloom dead.